Convince them in 90 Seconds
Make Instant Connections that Pay Off in Business & Life
In 2009, I had read more than 100 books. Typically one per week since then!
But, recently, I have a hard time recalling even one useful idea from each book, except those favorites. The lessons weren't sticking and were quickly being forgotten. That moment became a turning point in my life.
I realized that for ideas and lessons from books to stick, I needed to start writing some summaries and blog posts about each book. I need to review them, organize them, make them actionable. To turn them into something my clients and I could actually use in life.
And so in 2023, I am starting to create book summaries based on my highlights. Plus a to do list of actionable steps for others to use these summaries and if they read the book or not, put the theories into practice!
Hope you Enjoy this Weeks Book: Convince them in 90 Seconds by Nicholas Boothman
When I first picked up Nicholas Boothman's book in 2008, I was at a crossroads in my career. I had spent years as a dental hygienist, a role that taught me the importance of clear communication and a reassuring bedside manner. But there was a part of me that yearned for more — to create, to lead, to make a broader impact. That's when I decided to pivot and build a coaching practice, starting in the health space.
Boothman's insights on making a strong first impression were invaluable as I began networking to establish my new venture. I remember attending a health and wellness conference, armed with his advice. I focused on standing tall, maintaining eye contact, and listening — truly listening — to each person I met. It was like a light switch had been flipped. People were not just hearing me; they were engaging with me, and my fledgling practice began to grow.
As I ventured into business coaching, the lessons on the power of questions and active listening from Boothman's book became my daily mantras. I used these skills to dive deep into my clients' needs, uncovering the pain points that they couldn't see. This ability to listen and ask the right questions didn't just help me coach effectively; it was also crucial as I built my wholesale organic essential oil company. Understanding customer needs and market gaps through active listening and insightful queries helped me to tailor my products and services precisely.
But perhaps the most transformative aspect was the emphasis on vision. Boothman's book encouraged me to visualize not just the end goal but the steps to get there. This clarity of vision was what propelled me forward when I founded my digital marketing agency. I had a clear picture of the brand identity, the value we would offer, and the clients we aimed to serve. This vision guided every marketing strategy, every client proposal, and every content piece we created.
Throughout this journey, Boothman's principles on creating a positive impact and handling objections were my guiding stars. I learned to approach each interaction with a sense of humor, generosity, and gratitude, which not only won me business but also built lasting relationships. And when objections came — as they inevitably do in business — I embraced them as opportunities to learn and adapt, using them to refine my approach and offerings.
Closing deals, whether for my coaching services, essential oils, or marketing packages, became an exercise in timing and finesse, much like Boothman described. I learned to read the room, to sense when a client was ready to take the leap, and to offer that gentle nudge at just the right moment.
Boothman's book wasn't just a read; it was a journey that paralleled my own. From a dental hygienist to a multifaceted entrepreneur, the lessons I learned from those pages were more than just strategies; they were the building blocks of a career that continues to thrive on the principles of genuine connection, clear vision, and the power of listening.
I've always believed that the attitude we bring to the table is much like choosing the right outfit for an event—it sets the tone for the experience ahead. I remember coaching a client, Sarah, who struggled with maintaining a positive outlook. She'd often enter meetings with a cloud over her head, and it showed. We worked on starting her day with a gratitude journal, which became her emotional armor. It was remarkable to see how this small change shifted her perspective and, subsequently, how others responded to her more warmly.
Confidence, on the other hand, reminds me of another client, Tom, who was a brilliant mind but timid by nature. His ideas often went unheard in boardrooms. We tackled this by boosting his competence through additional certifications and role-playing exercises. I encouraged him to adopt 'power poses' before meetings, and soon, he reported feeling a surge of confidence, his ideas taking center stage.
As for mood awareness, I've had my own journey. There was a time when the slightest hiccup in my schedule could send me into a spiral. Through self-reflection, I recognized that a lack of sleep was my critical trigger. Prioritizing rest transformed not just my mood but my productivity. I also became a staunch advocate for creating environments that foster positivity. My office, filled with plants and natural light, is my sanctuary, and it's where I do my best work.
Mindfulness was another game-changer for me. I recall a particularly stressful week where nothing seemed to go right. I started practicing mindfulness meditation every morning, and suddenly, I wasn't just reacting to the chaos, I was responding to it with a calmness that surprised even me.
In weaving these threads together—attitude, confidence, and mood—it's clear they're the fabric of our professional persona. They're not just felt internally but are also the silent signals we broadcast to others. By consciously curating them, we can transform not just our interactions but our self-perception, paving the way for a more fulfilling professional journey.
Creating a stellar first impression is an art that combines several nuanced behaviors into a harmonious introduction. It begins with the confidence that comes from standing tall and embracing an open posture, signaling both self-assurance and receptivity. This physical foundation is complemented by attire that suits the occasion, which not only speaks to your respect for the context but also boosts your own confidence. A genuine, warm smile serves as a universal welcome sign, engaging and disarming in equal measure. Coupled with this is the importance of eye contact, which, when done correctly, fosters a connection and demonstrates your full attention.
Your body language continues this silent dialogue; open gestures and a slight lean-in show interest without encroaching on personal space. Meanwhile, a well-honed, succinct self-introduction can pique interest and invite further conversation. Listening then becomes your most valuable tool; active engagement with what others say not only informs you but also validates them. Sprinkling the conversation with the other person's name adds a personal touch, creating a sense of familiarity and rapport.
The energy you bring through positivity and enthusiasm can be infectious, setting a vibrant tone for the interaction. Yet, it's your authenticity that will leave a lasting impression, ensuring that the connection is both memorable and genuine. Good manners are the subtle yet crucial finishing touches to this interpersonal dance, demonstrating respect and consideration. Lastly, being fully present, undistracted by the digital world or surrounding bustle, shows the person you're with that they have your undivided attention, making them feel valued. This blend of behaviors, when executed with care and authenticity, can turn a brief encounter into a meaningful connection.
The power of questions in any form of communication is profound. Questions are the engines of intellect, the tools by which we dig for deeper understanding and insights. They propel us beyond the surface and enable us to explore the thoughts, feelings, and perspectives of others. In the context of business and personal interactions, questions serve several critical functions:
Engagement: Questions invite participation. They turn a monologue into a dialogue and create a two-way flow of information. When you ask someone a question, you're giving them the floor, showing that their views and experiences are of interest to you.
Discovery: Questions are how we learn. They allow us to gather information that isn't readily available. In a business setting, asking the right questions can reveal a client's needs and preferences, enabling you to tailor your services effectively.
Clarification: When we ask for clarification, we're seeking to understand more fully. This can prevent misunderstandings and ensure that all parties are on the same page, which is crucial in all forms of collaboration and negotiation.
Connection: Questions can build rapport. By asking about someone's experiences, thoughts, and feelings, you're showing that you value them as an individual. This can strengthen relationships and foster trust.
Reflection: Some questions prompt introspection. When you ask someone to reflect on an experience or to explain their reasoning, you're encouraging them to think deeply. This can lead to greater self-awareness and insight.
Direction: Questions can guide a conversation. You can steer the flow of discussion and keep it focused on specific topics by asking targeted questions.
Problem-Solving: By asking problem-solving questions, we can encourage critical thinking and innovation. These questions challenge assumptions and lead to creative solutions.
Empowerment: When you ask someone for their opinion or advice, you empower them. It's a way of acknowledging their expertise or experience, which can boost their confidence and engagement.
In my experience as a business coach, I've seen the power of questions transform conversations and relationships. For instance, when a client was struggling to articulate their business vision, I asked, "What does success look like to you?" This question prompted a shift from a vague idea to a clear, actionable vision. In another scenario, a client was facing resistance from their team. By encouraging them to ask their team members, "What do you think could be improved?" they opened a dialogue that led to valuable insights and a more cohesive team effort.
Questions are a simple yet powerful tool. They can unlock doors to hidden thoughts and potential, and when used wisely, they can elevate the quality of our interactions and our understanding of the world around us.
So, Nick Boothman's got this part in his book where he really hammers home how key it is to listen — and I mean really listen. It's not just about the words someone's throwing your way, but also the whole package: the vibe they're giving off, the look in their eyes, the energy behind their words. When you tune into all of that, you're not just hearing them, you're understanding them on a whole other level.
"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply." ~psychologist Carl R. Rogers
Then, he gets into the whole vision thing. He's all about having this crystal-clear picture in your head of what you want out of any chat or deal. It's like when you're super clear about where you're headed, your passion kicks into overdrive, and it shows. People can't help but get swept up in that kind of clarity and energy.
Boothman also talks about leaving your mark, in a good way. It's like when you meet someone who's just so generous with their compliments, who can laugh at themselves, and who's not stingy with a 'thank you' — you remember them, right? That's the kind of positive impact he's pushing for.
Now, when someone throws a curveball at you, Boothman's not about dodging it. He's like, 'Catch that ball and throw it back.' Acknowledge what they're worried about and use it to get into a real conversation, to dig deeper and find solutions together.
And when it's go-time, like you're ready to wrap things up or make that deal happen, he's all about choosing your moment. It's like asking someone out — you don't just blurt it out while they're mid-bite into a sandwich. You wait for the right pause in the conversation, make your move, and hopefully, end on a high note.
So, yeah, Boothman's dishing out some real talk on how to not just talk the talk but walk it, too, and make it count.
Now for the action items and to-do list for your business! The masterclass is below, based on my notes from this book, these action steps to building a network of followers, friends and clients that you truly love!
Not part of the “paid” Membership yet? Get a post like this once a week for $10 per month, receive actual business coaching in the Growth Intentions Membership NOW only $3000 for the year! Questions: Book a time with me Here!
Masterclass: Convince them in 90 Seconds
Welcome, valued client! As you've taken the step to invest in this masterclass, you're about to embark on a transformative journey for your business. Here are your action steps for building that instant connection and rapport to support you in business.
1. Cultivate Active Listening:
Daily Practice: Set a goal to have at least one conversation per day where you focus entirely on understanding the other person's perspective.
Feedback Loop: After meetings or important conversations, reflect or jot down key points you heard. This reinforces your listening skills and ensures you've understood correctly.
2. Sharpen Your Vision:
Vision Statement: Craft a clear and compelling vision statement for your business that outlines your goals and desired outcomes.
Visualization: Spend a few minutes each morning visualizing your goals as already achieved, feeling the associated emotions to fuel your daily tasks.
3. Make Positive Impressions:
Gratitude Practice: Start or end your day by writing down three things you’re grateful for in your business interactions.
Praise Others: Make it a point to genuinely compliment or praise at least one person in your business circle each day.
4. Handle Objections Gracefully:
Objection Journal: Keep a record of objections you encounter and write down how you addressed them. Review this journal to improve your responses over time.
Role-Playing: Regularly role-play potential objections with a mentor or team member to refine your strategies.
5. Master the Art of Closing:
Closing Techniques: Study different closing techniques and identify which ones align best with your business style and ethics.
Real-world Practice: Aim to practice a closing technique at least once a week, whether it's in a sales call, a negotiation, or even in setting deadlines for projects.
6. Develop a Positive Attitude:
Mindset Monitoring: Check in with your mindset throughout the day, adjusting towards positivity as needed.
Inspirational Input: Consume content (books, podcasts, talks) that reinforces a positive and growth-oriented mindset.
7. Build Confidence:
Skill Development: Identify areas where you need more knowledge or skill and take courses or seek out mentors to help you grow in those areas.
Success Celebrations: Celebrate small wins daily to build a habit of confidence.
8. Be Aware of Your Mood:
Mood Tracking: Use an app or journal to track your mood and its influences over time.
Self-Care Routine: Establish a self-care routine that includes exercise, hobbies, and relaxation to maintain a balanced mood.
By following this action plan, an entrepreneur can develop the interpersonal skills necessary for effective communication, build a strong business vision, and create positive interactions that lead to successful negotiations and lasting business relationships.
I would love to have your insights & feedback below and in The Chat! Suzanne
When you are ready to work with a coach and have a mentor in this entrerpeneurial journey, I would love to invite you to a conversation!
Our Next Book is Get the Meeting by Stu Heinecke